Another fun idea from the mind of Matthew Joseph Harrington:
If kzinti are part of the animated Star Trek universe, protectors are possible.
I never believed in phasers. Liked a weapon that could either disintegrate or KO without a bruise, yes; believed, no.
I envision a human protector coming up with a hand phaser with an amazing assortment of controls: Deafen, Hiccups, Embarrassing Personal Rash...
"All right, men, they've got it coming. Set phasers to Not Being Able To Get Showtunes Out of Your Head."
"Sir, I believe that's a violation of the Prime Directive."
"All right, make it Ice Cream Headache."